25 Things I learned last yr dealing with the opposite sex.
It's a slow news day.
1. Never turn a girl down if she wants to come home with you. It'll be the last time you see her. Even if you'd like to be friends.
2. If a girl is a freak, acts like a freak, and you have knowledge through a friend and strangers that she's a freak, don't call her on that shit. It'll be the last time you see her. Even if you'd like to be friends.
3. The minute you start dating someone everyone wants to get in your pants, but you can be single FOREVER and women leave you the hell alone. WTF.
4. If you're friends with a girl for a reeeeeaaalllyyy long time and you end up sleeping with her, make sure you're willing for that to be the last time you see her without it being "weird" if you ever see her at all.
5. No matter what you do, you'll always be wrong or better yet, "misunderstood"
6. Never go in with expectations. As a matter of fact, the lower you keep them the better. That way you're rarely disappointed.
7. If you just smile and ask questions, she'll think you're interested. All the while you're thinking about futbol or some random song lyric.
8. If a girl starts flirting with you, and she has a man, or better yet a husband, don't flirt back. It'll only cause problems or ill communication in the future.
9. If a girl is ridiculously good looking, and smart, then she's crazy or has severe emotional problems. Or not cool crazy, but single white female crazy.
10. You can be nice but don't be the nice guy.
11. If you're constantly trying to see a girl and she never has time for you but always has a good excuse, she's lying to you to be with someone else.
12. No girl is worth losing a good friend. Especially when the girl wasn't a good friend to you in the first place.
13. Some of the sweetest girls you'll meet are some of the biggest liars and heart breakers you'll meet.
14. If her brother says, she says, you tried to "force yourself on her" bring her into the conversation BEFORE the violence erupts.
15. Don't try to pick up sober girls drunk.
16. The louder they are the more you can rest assure they're trying to make up for something.
17. The coolest chicks are the quiet ones. They're also the craziest. Cool crazy tho.
18. Don't date a girl you met at the bar.
19. Don't try and pick up girls while they're working. Unless they make moves like they wanna do something later. Don't confuse that for trying to get a better tip tho.
20. You can only be 100% truthful with a girl who's ready for that shit. You can't be too real right off the bat or you're done son.
21. You can give a girl advice but she's gonna do the opposite so why bother?
22. If you pay for a concert, drinks, parking, etc etc.... don't assume you're going to get laid. Even if you spent down near a whole check.
23. An open relationship means she can do whatever she wants until her b.f finds out and wants your nuts on a platter.
24. If you offer to buy a girl a drink and she says she's gay bt accepts the drink and you end up going home with her then she's bi.
25. Stalker chicks are not cute. Some people don't know when it's o-v-e-r.
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